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Gay man boasts about owning homophobic 7-year-old at the park the other day — and manages to make *himself* the villain of his made-up story

We missed this gem the other day, and we’re gonna be kicking ourselves for a while. Because it’s amazing.

Ladies and gentlemen, we’d like to introduce you to one Robbie Pierce, a gay husband and father who seems to have a knack for encountering vicious homophobes. According to a recent pair of tweets, Pierce and his son were accosted by an unaccompanied 7-year-old boy who proceeded to tell them that gay people are the devil and going to hell. But that random seven-year-old didn’t plan on Pierce being such a badass:

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His eyes got so big! You shoulda seen ’em!

Game, set, and match. Right, Robbie? You sure taught that kid a lesson.

Somebody give Robbie a trophy. Or at least some kind of plaque or certificate or something!

https://twitter.com/sunflahr/status/1575370284617662469

Yeah, why the hell not? Why can’t Robbie say that?

Umm … maybe because Robbie didn’t say it. At least not to a random unaccompanied seven-year-old boy who for some reason had nothing better to do than to look for gay men to harass. Pierce doesn’t mention his husband, Neal, in these tweets, so if it was just him and his son, we’re not quite sure how this seven-year-old would have any idea that Pierce is gay. Is Pierce the kind of guy who goes looking for trouble? Or is he just the kind of guy who wishes he were brave enough to go looking for trouble, and if he were actually brave enough to go looking for trouble, he’d look for trouble with seven-year-olds? We’ll leave that up to you to decide.

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One thing that’s pretty clear, though, is that Robbie Pierce has got quite the imagination.

Of course it never happened. And the best part of it never having happened is that Robbie actually ultimately made himself the villain of the story.

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That’s Robbie, all right. So watch out, kids. He could be coming for you, too.

Actually, it’s funny you should mention that. As we mentioned early on in the post, Robbie seems to be a magnet for homophobes. And you might be interested to know that this isn’t the first time Robbie has encountered someone who can’t wait to talk about how much they hate gay people.

Earlier this year, Robbie and his husband made headlines across the media — in outlets such as NBC, the Daily Beast, BuzzFeed, and the New York Daily News — after an incident in which an Amtrak passenger became verbally abusive toward Robbie, Neal, and their two kids.

As with the recent story, the furor all began with a tweet from Pierce:

Feel free to read the whole thread if you like. We’ll give you the abridged version: Robbie and his family were harassed by a man whose homophobia was evidence of the damage that conservatives, Fox News, and J.K. Rowling have done to society. This happened while tensions were still high over Florida’s Parental Rights in Education bill, disingenuously characterized by liberals and media as the “Don’t Say Gay” bill. How interesting that Pierce would have had a run-in with a homophobic train passenger at this particular time. And how convenient that, just like the incident in the park, there was no video or even audio evidence to verify Pierce’s account. That doesn’t mean, of course, that this never happened (some outlets report that the harasser was removed from the train). But Pierce seems to have pulled through all right, having found a way to use the alleged incident to impugn conservatives and the GOP (and Fox News and J.K. Rowling).

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The park thing, on the other hand … that didn’t happen. It just didn’t. Poor Robbie had apparently decided that it had been too long since he last got attention for being a victim and needed to up the ante. By bragging about owning a seven-year-old.

If this doesn’t get turned into a movie, we hope that at the very least, Robbie gets some media coverage of out it. And we look forward to hearing about the homophobic dog who barks at him sometime next year.

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