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'Sexy Kangaroo Blocks Tourist From Toilet': These nominations for 2018 Headline of the Year are freakin' HYSTERICAL

It’s been a long, angry, and exhausting year … so what better way to celebrate that it’s ALMOST OVER with some nominations for the 2018 Headline of the Year. Especially when they include sex robots, kangaroos, bisexual geese, and Uranus?

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Enjoy.

Unstoppable bionic penises.

Gosh, that’s something you don’t see every day.

Bisexual goose in a love triangle with two swans.

Alrighty then.

YAAAAS! SLAY QUEEN!

Wait, can you call a nun, ‘queen’? Hrm.

A stapler? Something new from Apple? iStaple?

Poor Uranus.

Winning.

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This editor can absolutely relate to this parrot.

Dammit! Commas matter!

We knew it!

Kangaroo totally has bedroom eyes or something, right?

Yeah, if people have to be told …

President Tough Guy.

We like that.

Blame Bigfoot, that totally makes sense.

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Well sh*t.

Heh. This could be a Twitchy headline.

2019 is gonna be LIT!


Related:

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OMG LOL! Talib Kweli Greene doubles down on his ‘Nazis built the wall tweet’, deletes when Jonah Goldberg SCHOOLS him

‘His specialty is attacking blacks that work hard.’ Charles Payne just DECIMATED Al Sharpton and it was GLORIOUS

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