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'Sexy Kangaroo Blocks Tourist From Toilet': These nominations for 2018 Headline of the Year are freakin' HYSTERICAL

It’s been a long, angry, and exhausting year … so what better way to celebrate that it’s ALMOST OVER with some nominations for the 2018 Headline of the Year. Especially when they include sex robots, kangaroos, bisexual geese, and Uranus?

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Enjoy.

Unstoppable bionic penises.

Gosh, that’s something you don’t see every day.

Bisexual goose in a love triangle with two swans.

Alrighty then.

YAAAAS! SLAY QUEEN!

Wait, can you call a nun, ‘queen’? Hrm.

A stapler? Something new from Apple? iStaple?

Poor Uranus.

Winning.

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This editor can absolutely relate to this parrot.

Dammit! Commas matter!

We knew it!

Kangaroo totally has bedroom eyes or something, right?

Yeah, if people have to be told …

President Tough Guy.

We like that.

Blame Bigfoot, that totally makes sense.

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Well sh*t.

Heh. This could be a Twitchy headline.

2019 is gonna be LIT!


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‘His specialty is attacking blacks that work hard.’ Charles Payne just DECIMATED Al Sharpton and it was GLORIOUS

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