The crime crisis is running amok in America, at its worst in blue cities, but anytime we hear from the media about crime, they keep trotting out the lie that crime has actually gone down over the past few years. Now, we're not going to spend a lot of time here explaining the difference between crime rates and crime (and how it's easy to make crime rates go down if you ... stop enforcing laws or reporting crimes), we're pretty sure our readers know that.
Instead, we'd like to posit a different theory for why the media doesn't report on crime: it turns out, many of them are criminals too. And we all know what the criminals' unwritten code says happens to 'snitches.'
Evidence of the crime wave in the Fourth Estate came yesterday, courtesy of Sam Stein at Politico:
It appears that every single White House reporter is stealing stuff off of Air Force Onehttps://t.co/EdJOKxZvBf
— Sam Stein (@samstein) March 29, 2024
Wow. We knew reporters had sticky fingers, we just assumed that was from all the pastries they consume.
Everyone, it appears, is pilfering from Air Force One.
And it’s gotten so bad that last month, NBC correspondent KELLY O’DONNELL, the president of the White House Correspondents’ Association, included a terse reminder to colleagues that taking items off the plane was not allowed and reflected poorly on the press corps as a whole, several individuals who saw the off-the-record email confirmed.
The rampant thievery makes sense when you remember that Washington is a town populated by a lot of ambitious, status-seeking dorks. Many people who fly with the president on Air Force One really want you to know they’ve flown on Air Force One.
Attention, White House Press Corps: When Sam Stein -- SAM FREAKING STEIN -- is calling you a dork, there is a 100 percent chance that you are, in fact, a dork. They don't call the White House Correspondents' Dinner the 'nerd prom' for nothing.
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And it's not just M&Ms that they're stealing.
I thought this would be like pens, they taking entire glassware https://t.co/FCTin8mWsr pic.twitter.com/0ow5q1UZRm
— Adrian IAB (@adriaeln) March 29, 2024
Not just glassware, but dinnerware. But reporters keep telling us how great the economy is under Bidenomics, so why do they have to use pilfered, gold-rimmed AF1 plates for their dinner parties?
Make them fly in a C-130. https://t.co/QMMod4u77P
— Jeff_Schogol (@JSchogol73030) March 29, 2024
Better yet, make them fly in one of those reduced-gravity 'vomit comets' that NASA uses.
White House reporters are degenerate scum who have no idea how to behave properly, part 28181 https://t.co/08bOcDDOZs
— Imperialism Kaiju II 🇺🇸 (@TonyMoonbeam) March 29, 2024
We have witnessed many of parts 1 - 28180.
Of course, one or two people were willing to stick up (no pun intended) for the journos here. Guess what their arguments tended to be?
I'm sorry but in comparison to the things that trump stole from us (e.g., confidential docs, our Democracy, our proud reputation, etc.) I can't get worked up over a wine glass or blanket.😒
— MarChar Is Sick Of All The Bull Shit🐂💩 (@MarTheResister) March 29, 2024
That's right, 'BUT TRUUUUUUUUUUUMP.' It's really the only card many of them have to play.
Others had more interesting theories about the spike in AF1 petty piracy.
Hunter is selling it to them.
— JWF (@JammieWF) March 29, 2024
With every Hunter Biden $500,000 painting a reporter buys, they get a free AF1 pillowcase.
We're not making up that last part. One reporter actually was caught stealing an AF1-embroidered pillowcase. (We shudder to think what he or she was doing with that.)
Arrest them all
— Jim Muessig (@JimMuessig) March 29, 2024
We like that idea, but a FAR worse punishment for a reporter would simply be to ban them from traveling on AF1. As Stein said, they are status-seeking dorks. Getting booted off of the ultimate DC status symbol would crush them. Boxes of wine and tearful rants on Twitter would flow freely.
A byproduct of a type of voyeurism borne of proximity to power.
— Zeitgeist Rodeo (@BiglyBowski) March 29, 2024
The press craves the reflected importance, but knows it will never be accepted by those they cover. The blowback is a mix of insecurity & guilt that blends into entitlement.
Thus the thieving of symbolic trinkets.
So the crooked MSM blue check journos were the real criminals all along? Quelle surprise.
— franz (@neozeed) March 29, 2024
It's always the ones you ... MOST suspect.
All the White House reporters trying to stuff Air Force One themed wine glasses in their bags like they are Uncle Frank from Home Alone https://t.co/XndLuam5om pic.twitter.com/8z3c5PTsd6
— Valerie Insinna (@ValerieInsinna) March 29, 2024
HA. Uncle Frank was a jerk.
There’s a reason why the late L.A. radio personality Jim Healy would address journalist with, “Attention media freeloaders …” accompanied by a sound effect of pigs at a trough. https://t.co/yFY2BhzdX1
— Brett From L.A. (@ItsBrettFromLA) March 29, 2024
Both the salutation and the sound effect here seem to be spot on.
Dear press corps, don't cry when people ignore your paywalll. To quote one reporter here, "Everyone does it." https://t.co/6j9qtM5gAv
— Quena González (@QuenaGonzalez) March 29, 2024
This is a very good point. [Cough -- Wayback Machine -- cough.]
Whaaat? pic.twitter.com/Ge7jliPcVZ
— Shoshanah in AK (@ShanahStone) March 29, 2024
LOL. Good old Marv.
Of course, many people on Twitter commented that they'd probably be tempted to take a souvenir if they ever rode on Air Force One. We get that. But a couple of things to remember:
Reporters are not just taking pens or boxes of M&Ms. They're stealing some pretty expensive stuff, like White House dinnerware.
Everything on Air Force One is publicly funded. Which means, every time a journo swipes a gold-rimmed china plate, they are not stealing from the President, they are stealing from taxpayers.
Is it the biggest crime in the world? Of course not. But it's still waste, fraud, and abuse of our tax money. By journalists who, for the most part, hate Americans.
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