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President signs bill removing derogatory, outdated, and hurtful language from US law

President Obama climbed aboard Air Force One Saturday for his first trip to Vietnam and his fourth to Japan, knowing that he’d left America a better place. Not only did he squeeze in more than four hours of golf — he also signed Rep. Grace Meng’s bill removing the “derogatory and outdated” word Oriental from U.S. law.

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The bill to modernize legal language was a true bipartisan effort, passing both the House and Senate unanimously.

In a press release, Meng acknowledged that “many Americans may not be aware that the word ‘Oriental’ is derogatory” but assured the public that it is both insulting and offensive.

In addition, American Indian, Eskimo, and Aleut, as well as “Spanish speaking individual of Spanish descent” in U.S. law will be replaced by Native American, Alaska Native, and Hispanic. The terms Native Hawaiian and Pacific Islander will be added, and Puerto Ricans will remain Puerto Ricans.

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As an added bonus, African American will officially replace the word Negro in U.S. law, although the n-word will still be fair game at private sector events like “Negro Night,” formerly known as the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, where it will remain simultaneously considered hilarious and deeply respectful, at least until next year’s White House Correspondents’ Dinner.

Social justice warriors remain free to refer to the entirely of the world’s oppressed as “black and brown people.” For example:

https://twitter.com/Niayla_S/status/730580920193953792

The federal modernization of the language is happening quickly. Earlier this month, the DOJ’s Office of Justice Programs did away with terms like offender and felon in favor of “person who committed a crime” and “individual who was incarcerated” in order to “decouple” the person who committed a crime from his or her past actions.

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