A special place in hell for those who don’t find Vermin Supreme funny? He’s probably much more amusing if you limit your exposure to a few minutes every four years, when a flat $1,000 fee is all it takes to be added to the New Hampshire ballot. At least 15-year-old Iowa prankster Deez Nuts knew enough to give up on the joke back in August, but Vermin Supreme has been annoying presidential candidates for decades.
This year, Vermin Supreme has a four-point platform:
- Mandatory tooth brushing laws
- Time travel research
- Zombie preparedness
- Free ponies for all Americans
Supreme tracked down Sen. Ted Cruz and was able to get close enough to demand that terrorists be waterboarded with fluoridated water. (Mild language warning.)
Vermin Supreme trolls Ted Cruzhttps://t.co/sSdA3u9fyd
— IJR (@TheIJR) February 9, 2016
https://twitter.com/RosieGray/status/696887438971633664
That’s … unfortunate. Look at the joy he’s brought to Chris Christie’s security detail with his goofy antics.
Democratic candidate Vermin Supreme & a member of NJ Gov. Chris Christie's security detail in Salem, NH. #NHPrimary pic.twitter.com/TUelrtKM79
— Greg Saulmon (@GregSaulmon) February 9, 2016
https://twitter.com/bennyjohnson/status/696866553992736768
HUGE ground game for @VerminSupreme pic.twitter.com/FPpCFdKSqp
— Benny (@bennyjohnson) February 9, 2016
Camouflaged among Trump and Fiorina campaign signs were representatives of Time Traveling Mothers Against Vermin Supreme.
Recommended
https://twitter.com/lachlan/status/697172367244591104
.@lachlan was just offered a pony by @VerminSupreme in exchange for his vote pic.twitter.com/NxScEcpB6I
— Brent Scher (@BrentScher) February 9, 2016
Remember New Hampshirites: Vote #VerminSupreme for 2016. He'll give a pony to every American. Now that's a change we can believe in. ?
— Liz Renner (@LizardShad) February 9, 2016
Considering voting for Vermin Supreme based on his determination to fight oral decay
— Rick (@Sick__Rick) February 9, 2016
***
Don’t forget to check out Townhall.com’s live New Hampshire Primary results tonight!
Join the conversation as a VIP Member